Helping Children Thrive During Holidays with Sensory Issues
Holidays can be exciting, busy, and full of traditions. They can also be intense and confusing for neurodiverse children who experience the world through very sensitive sensory systems. If your child melts down at family gatherings, hides from holiday music, or refuses festive outfits, you are not alone. Sensory differences are common, and with the right support, families can still enjoy meaningful celebrations.
What Are Sensory Processing Challenges?
Sensory processing is how the brain takes in information from the senses, makes sense of it, and responds. For many neurodiverse children, that process can feel either “too much,” “too little,” or “too mixed up.”
When a child has sensory processing challenges, their brain might:
Notice every tiny sound, texture, or movement, which can feel overwhelming
Miss or underrespond to sensory input, which can lead to seeking intense sensations
Have trouble filtering background input, which makes it hard to focus or stay calm
These differences are not “bad behavior.” They are nervous system responses. At Colorado Behavior and Learning Group, we look at these responses as important communication about what a child’s body and brain need.
Common Types of Sensory Sensitivities
Auditory (Sound)
Holiday sounds can feel painful or startling. Children might cover their ears, cry, or run away from:
Loud music or singing
Unexpected noises such as timers, alarms, or cheering
Tactile (Touch)
Textures that seem “normal” to adults can feel unbearable for a child with tactile sensitivities, such as:
Itchy clothing, tags, or formal holiday outfits
Hugs and physical greetings from relatives
Sticky, messy holiday crafts or foods
Visual (Sight)
Holiday spaces are often bright and busy. Children may become overwhelmed by:
Flashing lights or large light displays
Crowded decorations on walls, tables, or trees
New environments that look very different from usual
Other Sensory Systems
Some children are also sensitive to:
Smell, such as strong candles, perfumes, or holiday cooking
Taste, including new foods or strong flavors at gatherings
Movement, such as busy, fast paced events or long car rides
Why Holidays Can Feel Overwhelming
Holidays combine many sensory demands all at once. Routines change, sleep schedules shift, and children are surrounded by new people, expectations, and environments. For a child whose nervous system already works hard to sort through sensory input, this can lead to overload.
Overload might look like tantrums, shutdowns, “refusing” activities, running away, or getting extra silly or wild. These are stress signals, not character flaws. When caregivers, providers, and referral partners understand sensory processing, we can plan ahead, reduce triggers, and help each child participate in ways that feel safe and manageable.
Common Holiday Challenges for Children with Sensory Issues
Holiday activities are often built around “big” experiences, such as loud parties, bright decorations, and packed schedules. For a neurodiverse child with sensory differences, those same traditions can feel confusing, painful, or exhausting. Understanding the specific triggers can help you, your care team, and your child plan for calmer, more successful celebrations.
Loud Noises and Constant Sound
Holiday music in every room, crowded conversations, kitchen sounds, and sudden cheers can all pile up. Children may:
Cover their ears or cry when music starts
Yell, repeat phrases, or make louder sounds to “compete” with the noise
Refuse to enter certain rooms or events that they know are noisy
These reactions can be misread as “being rude” or “not participating,” when the child may simply be trying to protect their senses.
Bright Lights and Busy Visuals
Twinkling lights, animated decorations, screens, and crowded displays can overwhelm visual processing. Children might:
Stare, freeze, or appear “checked out”
Become irritable or hyperactive in decorated spaces
Insist on turning lights off or leaving quickly
What looks festive to adults can feel like visual clutter that makes it hard for a child to think, listen, or follow directions.
Crowded Gatherings and Social Demands
Large family events, school parties, and community activities bring many sensory and social demands at once. A child may:
Cling to one caregiver and avoid interacting
Run, jump, or crash into things in order to cope with the space
Have meltdowns during transitions, such as arriving or saying goodbye
To others, this can look like “bad behavior.” In reality, the child is often doing their best to self regulate in a setting that feels unpredictable.
Unfamiliar Routines and New Environments
Changes in school schedules, travel, different sleeping spaces, and new foods can all add stress. Children may:
Refuse to get dressed or leave the house for events
Have trouble with sleep, appetite, or toileting
Withdraw from activities they usually enjoy
These shifts impact behavior, mood, and participation. When the nervous system is overwhelmed, a child has less capacity for sharing, waiting, following directions, and flexible thinking.
The key takeaway Holidays are not “too fun” for your child. They are often too intense. With planning and sensory aware supports, families and care teams can adjust traditions so children can participate in ways that feel safer and more comfortable.
Preparation Strategies for Parents and Caregivers
Solid preparation can lower stress for your child and for you. Think of it as planning for your child’s nervous system, not just planning your calendar. The goal is simple, predictable holidays that fit your child, rather than forcing your child to fit the holiday.
Create Clear Visual Plans
Many neurodiverse children do better when they can see what is coming. A visual schedule turns an unknown day into a predictable one.
Use pictures, symbols, or simple words to show the sequence of the day.
Include sensory breaks, such as “quiet time in bedroom” or “tablet break in car.”
Cross off each event as it happens so your child can see progress.
You can also build simple social stories that show what to expect at a specific event, such as a family dinner or a visit with relatives. Use calm, concrete language and keep it short.
Introduce New Experiences Gradually
Holidays often come with new sounds, people, and routines. Whenever possible, introduce those changes in small pieces.
Practice with holiday music at a low volume for short times.
Let your child try on outfits or new shoes ahead of time and adjust tags or fabrics if needed.
Show photos of the place you are going so the environment feels more familiar.
Do “mini visits,” such as stopping by an event for a short period first, then building up time if it goes well.
Choose or Adjust Activities To Be Sensory Friendly
You do not have to attend every event or follow every tradition. It is okay to choose what works for your child.
Pick quieter events or earlier time slots when crowds are smaller.
Bring comfort items, such as headphones, a favorite toy, fidgets, or a preferred snack.
Plan a “job” for your child, such as handing out napkins or helping set a small table, to create structure.
Decide ahead of time on a clear exit plan, for example, “We will stay for [insert time] if things are going well, then leave for home and quiet time.”
Communicate Sensory Needs With Family and Hosts
Clear communication protects your child and reduces awkward moments for you. Share your child’s sensory profile before events.
Explain what supports help, such as keeping music low, skipping surprise hugs, or having a quiet room available.
Let hosts know you might take breaks or leave early and that this is part of your plan, not a rejection.
Offer simple guidance, such as, “Please greet [child’s name] with a wave instead of a hug,” or “If you see them with headphones, that means they need quiet.”
When caregivers, extended family, and providers use the same plan, holidays become more predictable, safer, and more enjoyable for neurodiverse children and the adults who love them.
Creating Sensory-Friendly Holiday Environments
You cannot control every part of the holidays, but you can shape your child’s environment so it feels safer and more manageable. Small, thoughtful changes at home and in community settings can lower sensory overload and help your child join in at their own pace.
Design a Clear Quiet Space
A quiet space gives your child a place to reset when things feel “too big.” At home or at a relative’s house, you can:
Choose a consistent spot such as a bedroom corner or a specific chair.
Keep lighting soft with lamps instead of bright overhead lights.
Stock it with calming items, such as a blanket, stuffed animal, favorite book, or headphones.
Teach a simple phrase or signal your child can use to ask for “quiet room time.”
Share this plan with family or hosts so others know to protect that space and respect your child’s breaks.
Build a Simple Sensory Toolkit
A portable sensory toolkit can travel with you to gatherings, religious services, or community events. Consider including:
Noise reducing headphones or earplugs.
Fidgets, chewy jewelry, or a small sensory toy.
A preferred snack and drink to reduce stress around unfamiliar foods.
A small visual support, such as a mini schedule or “break” card.
Keep the kit in a familiar bag so your child knows it is “theirs.” Offer it before behavior escalates, not only after a meltdown starts.
Adjust Lights, Sounds, and Decorations
Festive does not have to mean overwhelming. To support sensory comfort, you might:
Use steady lights instead of flashing ones, or limit light displays to certain rooms.
Set music at a low volume and choose calmer playlists.
Keep one area of the home less decorated so your child has a visually quieter zone.
Seat your child away from speakers, kitchens, or high traffic areas at gatherings.
These changes help your child think, listen, and play without constant sensory strain.
Plan Predictable Breaks Into Every Event
Breaks work best when they are planned, not treated as “giving up.” You can:
Schedule short breaks on your child’s visual plan, for example, “party, then car break.”
Use timers so your child knows how long they will be in a busy setting and how long the break will last.
Offer choices, such as “Do you want your break in the quiet room or in the car with your tablet.”
Agree ahead of time with other adults about a clear “leave if needed” plan.
Think of the environment as part of your child’s support team. When the space, tools, and schedule match your child’s sensory needs, holidays become less about “getting through it” and more about finding the moments that truly matter to your family.
Support and Advocacy for Professionals and Referral Partners
Professionals and referral partners play a key role in how families experience the holidays. When case managers, school counselors, pediatricians, Medicaid providers, and community partners understand sensory needs, families feel less alone and more prepared. At Colorado Behavior and Learning Group, we see this as true wraparound work, where every member of the care team pulls in the same direction.
Start With Sensory Aware Conversations
Use routine visits and check ins before and during the holiday season to ask targeted questions about sensory needs. You might explore:
What parts of past holidays felt hardest for the child and family
Specific sensory triggers, such as sound, touch, or changes in routine
What has helped in the past, such as headphones, visual schedules, or shorter visits
Normalize these conversations. Frame sensory planning as a standard part of supporting neurodiverse children, not as something extra that families should “just figure out.”
Coordinate Care Plans That Include Sensory Supports
Professionals can help families by weaving sensory needs into existing care plans, school supports, or service authorizations. Consider collaborating to:
Align school behavior plans and clinic based ABA goals with home holiday plans
Identify when additional respite, ABA hours, or in home support may be helpful during school breaks
Clarify crisis plans, including who families can call if behaviors escalate during the holidays
When everyone shares the same language and strategies, children receive consistent messages in home, school, and community settings.
Provide Targeted Resource Referrals
Many families do not know what is available to help. Professionals can offer:
Referrals to ABA providers that understand sensory needs, such as CBLG Clinics and CBLG Residential
Information about person centered transportation supports, such as Van with a Plan
Connections to respite care, parent training programs, and holiday sensory friendly events in their area
Keep a working list of local and statewide resources, with space to add [insert local program] or [insert community event], so families leave each interaction with at least one concrete next step.
Educate and Equip Families for Holiday Planning
Short, practical tools can make a big difference. Professionals can help by:
Offering simple templates for visual schedules, social stories, and sensory toolkits
Coaching caregivers on how to explain sensory needs to extended family or hosts
Reviewing warning signs of sensory overload and strategies to de escalate before crisis
When professionals, caregivers, and ABA teams partner in this way, holidays become more predictable and less stressful for everyone involved. This is how we support the whole person and the whole family, one planned tradition at a time.
Self-Care and Stress Management for Families and Caregivers
Caring for a neurodiverse child during the holidays asks a lot from you. Extra planning, changes in routine, travel, and family expectations can drain your time and energy. Your wellbeing is not a luxury. It is a key part of helping your child feel safe, regulated, and connected.
Why Caregiver Wellbeing Matters
Children often borrow your calm. When you feel exhausted or on edge, it becomes harder to stay patient during meltdowns, stick with routines, or follow through with sensory supports.
Prioritizing your own needs is part of your child’s care plan. When caregivers have rest, support, and realistic expectations, the whole family is more resilient.
Set Realistic Holiday Expectations
Pressure to create a “perfect” holiday can add unnecessary stress. Instead, focus on what matters most to your family right now.
Choose a few meaningful traditions and let the rest go for this year.
Plan shorter visits or smaller gatherings that match your child’s sensory needs.
Decide ahead of time what you will say if others push for more than your child can handle.
Give yourself permission to leave early, skip events, or change plans if your child is struggling.
You are allowed to design a holiday that fits your family, not everyone else’s expectations.
Build Simple Daily Stress-Management Habits
You do not need a long routine to care for yourself. Short, consistent practices can make a real difference.
Use brief grounding strategies, such as slow breathing for [insert number] breaths before responding to a meltdown.
Schedule tiny breaks, for example, a quiet drink of water alone or a short walk while another adult supervises.
Prepare in advance, such as packing bags the night before, to reduce last minute stress.
Notice one thing that went “well enough” each day to counter constant problem solving.
Share the Load and Ask for Help
You are not meant to handle everything alone. Support can come from many places, including family, friends, ABA teams, and community providers.
Divide tasks with another adult, such as one person handling sensory supports while the other manages relatives or logistics.
Use respite care, trusted sitters, or programs like CBLG Residential and Van with a Plan where appropriate to create breathing room.
Let supportive family members know exactly what helps, for example, “Can you take [insert task] so I can sit with our child in the quiet room.”
Seek Peer and Professional Support
Hearing “me too” from other caregivers can lower isolation and shame. Professional guidance can add structure and specific strategies.
Connect with parent groups, online communities, or local support circles focused on neurodiversity.
Talk with your child’s BCBA, counselor, or pediatric provider about your holiday stress, not only your child’s behavior.
Ask professionals for [insert resource type], such as caregiver trainings or support groups that fit your schedule.
You are a central part of your child’s support team. When your needs are seen and supported, it becomes easier to show up with the patience, creativity, and steady presence your child needs during the holidays and throughout the year.
Resources and Tools for Navigating the Holidays
You do not have to build a sensory friendly holiday from scratch. Simple, reusable tools can give you a starting point, whether you are a caregiver planning at home or a professional supporting several families. Use the ideas below as menus and templates you can adapt to your child, your setting, and your traditions.
Sensory-Friendly Holiday Activity Ideas
Choose activities that match your child’s sensory profile and provide clear structure. You might build your plan from categories like:
Calming activities such as quiet story times, simple crafts at the table, or looking at lights from inside a car.
Movement activities such as short walks, indoor obstacle paths, or “heavy work” jobs like carrying small bags or helping set chairs.
Low demand traditions such as decorating one small area, choosing one song, or helping with a single step of a recipe instead of the whole event.
Solo or small group activities such as puzzles, building sets, or sensory bins that allow your child to participate near others without constant interaction.
Create a brief activity menu and let your child pick from [insert number] options, so holidays feel collaborative rather than pressured.
Templates for Visual Schedules and Social Stories
Visual tools help children understand what will happen and what is expected. You can create your own with paper, pictures, or a digital tool using these frameworks:
Daily holiday schedule template with blocks for “morning,” “afternoon,” and “evening,” each listing [insert number] main events plus planned breaks.
Event specific schedule that shows steps such as “drive in car, say hello, play, eat, break, say goodbye, drive home.”
Social story template that follows a pattern, such as “Sometimes we [insert event]. At [place], there might be [insert sensory input]. If I feel [insert feeling], I can [insert coping strategy]. Grown ups will help me.”
Professionals can keep blank versions of these templates ready to customize with families during sessions or visits.
Checklists and Planning Guides for Caregivers
Written checklists reduce decision fatigue and help you remember supports when you are rushed. Useful planning tools include:
Pre event checklist with items such as “sensory kit packed, visual schedule updated, quiet space identified, exit plan confirmed.”
Communication script sheet with short phrases caregivers can use to explain sensory needs to relatives or hosts.
Behavior signal list that notes early signs of overload and matching strategies, for example, “pacing equals offer headphones and break card.”
Finding Community Support and Professional Help
Local and statewide resources can extend what you can do alone. Families and professionals can look for:
Community groups such as neurodiversity affirming parent groups, caregiver meetups, or peer led online communities that share holiday planning ideas.
Professional services such as ABA providers, mental health clinicians, and pediatric practices that understand sensory needs and offer holiday focused planning support.
Respite and support programs such as [insert local respite resource], [insert holiday sensory friendly event], or [insert community program] that create lower stress options when school is out.
At Colorado Behavior and Learning Group, our teams at CB LG Clinics, CBLG Residential, and Van with a Plan coordinate with families and referral partners to build practical, repeatable tools like these. You deserve a holiday toolkit that fits your child, respects your capacity, and can grow with your family from year to year.